Well i am now on my 150th day without a seizure. I am most pleased lol.
This is the longest I have gone since being diagnosed and it feels good.
Sticking to my strict meds regime is the only time I am reminded of my condition so thats 2 short periods in each day otherwise I feel totally relaxed and free, dare I say normal? (If you have visited my Scotland the what blogspot you will realise I am nothing of the sort lol).
What I do have to work on tho is everyone around me. My wife, best friends and aquaintances are all still on edge. In fact it seems the longer I go without having a seizure the more worried they are about "When is it going to happen?" "Its been a while he is due one!" "He hasnt had one for ages the next one is going to be Huge!".
What do I have to do to be totally free for even one day? I know, and ill repeat this hundreds of times, they are just worried and concerned but we need to forget. We need to be able to relax, have fun and yes LIVE LIFE. Its really difficult when you are constantly aware of folks watching, waiting, mentally holding their breath for the big event!
So this is what Im going to do.............
October. Month of half term and local holidays.
I am packing my bags and heading off on a wee tour of Scotland. Staying in Bed and Breakfasts and doing my own thing in my own time.
I will enjoy the local bars and restaurants, I will get drunk, I will sleep late, I will be irresponsible,I will be on my own and I will be happy for 7 whole days.
Selfish? Maybe but after 20 years of being packed in cotton wool, watched and told not to do things just in case I think for 1 week I am entitled to be.
I would recommend everyone to do this at some point in their life. Epileptic or not. Obviously some of you may feel uneasy going it alone, take your best friend but dont take family. Head off, be irrisponsible, let your hair down and be free.
Let me know how you get on.
Have fun, enjoy and I'll see you soon.